Woman ‘dies of embarrassment’ when handyman spots s.e.x toy stuck on bathroom wall

A woman was left red-faced when a giant s.e.x toy gifted by her friends as a joke came back to haunt her.

Jem Calvert was cleaning her bathroom one night and came across the s.e.x toy she had forgotten about – so decided to stick it on the wall.

After completing her chores, Jem, who lives in Belfast, went to bed and then headed off to work the next morning without giving it a second thought.

But it wasn’t until the civil servant had a visit from a handyman who couldn’t help but spot the giant phallus hanging on her wall when he had to use her loo that she remembered her mistake, reports the Daily Star.

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Posting on Facebook , Jem wrote: “So I have this hilarious dildo in my house because who doesn’t have one that one of your friends have bought for hilarious jokes.”

 She continued: “I was cleaning my bathroom last night and bleaching everything and this dildo has been in it for months so I took it out and stuck it on the wall while cleaning because why not.

“[So] I went to bed and then went to work. When I came home home there was a man at my door saying about checking my boiler.”

She continued: “I let him in and he asked to use the toilet and I was like ‘yeah there’s loads of bags and rubbish in there so just move it out of the way’.
“I heard the door shut and then I realised about this stupid dildo stuck on the wall and I actually wanted to scream because there was no TV or anything on in my house, pure silence, just me and the dildo and my boiler man.

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“This man obviously had to walk past this dildo with it brushing his leg to pee. Please I am so embarrassed and want to die 8 thousand deaths I thought sh*t like this only happened in f***ing movies.”

Jem continued to tell her Facebook friends that when he came out of the toilet, there was a complete silence between them.

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Since she shared the hilarious story online, it secured more than 2,100 shares and 5,500 likes from amused pals.

One said: “I am crying.”

Another added: “Best thing I have ever read hahaha.”

It turns out Jem’s boiler man had the same idea, as one Facebook user shared a photo of him posing with the dildo.

He said: “The other day I was at a clients house fixing a boiler when I saw this absolute weapon on the wall.

“When I went out to talk to her she didn’t seem to give a flying f**k – just got tagged in this, turns out she actually did.”

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